Two Weeks.

It's true. Can you believe it?

I'm not really quite sure where the time went. In the next two weeks, Julie and I will be finishing up the school year, wrapping up last minute things like report cards and end-of-the-year celebrations. Abby will be continuing to plan a July wedding, putting some of the finishing touches on the exciting day.

And, then, we'll set all that aside to drive to Chicago on a Sunday evening. After a night of sleep (or maybe trying to sleep), we'll head to O'Hare and set off on the journey of a lifetime.

I have been realizing lately that I do not feel prepared. At all. I am not packed. I just got my last vaccination today, but still have prescriptions to fill. We have 160 pairs of shoes sitting at our house, waiting to go in suitcases. I am not mentally prepared. I am not emotionally prepared to meet the birthmother of my siblings who is living as a victor over AIDS every single day. And, mostly, I have not been feeling spiritually prepared. I have been so overwhelmed with busyness and have neglected time with Jesus much more than I want to. But, God has reminded me once again that

IT IS NOT ABOUT ME. IT'S ABOUT HIM.

[and its HIS grace that will sustain us on this adventure, not my own preparation, or lack thereof]

-Kate

making Jesus famous

Over the past year or so I've been thinking especially about what it means to live a life of complete surrender to the Lord. I usually like to do what I can to take care of things, to not have to wait on other people, to not have to depend on someone else coming through to get things done. And sometimes that's ok. But other times, it is deeply rooted in pride, and it gets in the way of me seeing God do miraculous things (like I say I want to see Him do).

Mostly through "accident"-not of my own choosing, I've found myself in an increasing amount of situations where I have the:

"I cannot do this on my own.

If God does not show up in this,

this is going to be a complete and utter disaster" thought.

I was sharing about this with a friend earlier this year and my friend said something like, "Julie, isn't that where you always be?!: involved in things where God is so much at the center that we cannot convince ourselves WE were the ones bringing change or doing good. If God is calling you some place, He is going to equip you and He wants you to depend on Him to come through."

And then, how frequently God will echo things He's trying to teach me in lots of different ways, He has continued to remind me about how He wants me to let Him take care of things...

(2) In Jesus Calling by Sarah Young--(if you don't know this book, I'd highly recommend it...it has daily words written based on Truth in scripture, prompted by the Holy Spirit, and grounded in God's character)--there are all these things that keep challenging me:

*"Do not fear your limitations or measure the day's demands to your strength. What I require of you is to stay connected to Me, living in trusting dependence on My limitless resources."

*"Although self-sufficiency is acclaimed in the world, reliance on Me produces abundant living in My kingdom."

*"Living in dependence on Me is the way to enjoy abundant life."

*"The truth is that self-sufficency is a myth perpetuated by pride and temporary success. Health and wealth can disappear instantly, as can life itself. Rejoice in your insufficiency, knowing that My power is made perfect in weakness."

...the list goes on and on.

(2) Our roommate is a 4th grade teacher. One of her students wrote her a note saying that her family is in the process of adopting from Ethiopia. The note said, "We don't really know how we are going to do it (we need God's help). So we are also doing it to make Jesus famous because we can't do it without him." She gets it. I don't need to be wondering what I can do on my own strength. I need to be asking what God is prompting and then go confidently trusting that He will provide and work through me.

God has been confirming (through conversations, through donations, through people we're meeting who are connected with Ethiopia, through things we're reading, through support of our friends and families, through Scripture) that this isn't some crazy plan that we made up ourselves. It is prompted by Him, and He isn't going to hold out on coming through with what we need.

So...

us.

Ethiopia.

plans.

travel.

logistics.

energy.

time.

preparations.

in all of these things, God has been reminding me that He has got it under control.

We need to faithful in praying about our plans, intentional with our resources, etc....but, it isn't about us.

Ephesians 3:20-21

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we ask or think, according to the power that is at work in us, to Him be the glory.

~Julie

We have officially raised over $9,000. We have a massive bag of brand new shoes waiting to be stuffed in a suitcase and flown to Ethiopia with us to give to the orphanage. We are in the process of making sure we have all the vaccines we need. We know where we are staying, and, generally, what we will be doing.

Yet I feel no where close to prepared for Ethiopia. We leave in 44 days, and it hasn't really hit me yet that we're really going. We're going to Africa, meeting Ayehu, helping wherever we can, and, most likely, we will be seeing things we weren't prepared for, things that will shock us and sadden us.

So, while it seems most of our plans are set, please continue to pray for preparation... Pray that God's plans will triumph over ours. Pray that we will not overwhelmed, but that we will be able to see both the beauty and the ugliness of Africa with hope and not despair. We are so thankful for all of you and for the support we've felt from so many of our friends and family.

I'll leave you with a quote from Shauna Niequist in Cold Tangerines, about her trip to Africa:

"I had to clear away space in my mind and my heart, spaces previously occupied by easy things-- groceries to buy, albums to download, people to call-- and replace them with the weight of Africa, a heavy, dark thing to carry with me, something under which to labor, something under which to tremble. Because once you see it, you will never be able to un-see it, and once you see it, you will be responsible for it, and for the self it reveals back to you."

Abby